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Change Is In The Air

Change Is In The Air

It’s been another couple of months since the last time I logged in to make a post. It’s been a whirlwind in the intervening time: work, family, house fixes during the good weather…

But enough with the excuses, life is always going to demand attention, and whatever I spend my time on is what I’m prioritizing. I still want to make this one of those priorities. Writing out my thoughts and experiences has made me feel empowered, like I have a voice and a story that matters.

Last year around this time was when I started to kick this idea of my own website and brand into high gear. It was the beginning of many long term projects, including the home improvement projects necessary for us to move into the house we purchased one short year ago today. Somehow I managed to continue to prioritize writing through everything that was going on until it all started to settle down in April. Or so I thought… Continue reading “Change Is In The Air”

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24 Month Marathon

This post is kind of similar to my New Year’s Eve post, in that a lot of the low points of 2016 are also covered in what made the last two years so rough. While my repetition of the subject feels a bit like complaining, sympathy is not my goal.

I don’t generally like to share how I’m feeling with people around me. If I’m upset about something, I’m more likely to be found hiding than running to someone for comfort. My emotions show on my face a lot more easily than I want them to. I’d rather stuff my feelings down until I can deal with them alone. Instead, I wind up brooding about what’s going on in my life instead of facing it and recognizing that it is OK to not be OK.

Today I am claiming my pain. I’ve survived through it all and become stronger because of it. Continue reading “24 Month Marathon”

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Taking A Look Back [2016]

I am a very chronologically aware individual. I love dates, relative events, and time. As much as I can, I spend time reminiscing and remembering, because I put value in being able to recall things that are important to me. My skill in remembering things I care about often bleeds over into useless memories, or unpleasant ones I wish I could forget. When I remember that dumb thing I said last week in a meeting, or bring up an inside joke I thought of that no one else remembers, I’m reminded that this skill takes a level of control to be valuable to me.

People around me with shorter memories can get annoyed when I bring up things they no longer remember, and it makes me feel really awkward. But I remind them that if something were important to them, they would remember it. My brain just decides a lot of strange things are extremely important to remember, and I let it.

In fact, I have realized that I actually tend to cultivate it through some of my behavior. Continue reading “Taking A Look Back [2016]”

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Preparing To Move

Change is hard. Some people like change, some are even addicted to change, but for me it’s hard.

I tend to avoid change for that reason, along with my inherent laziness and procrastination. Small changes aren’t immune to my avoidance either. I would rather spend an extra five minutes every morning instead of going to get my hair cut, because the change isn’t worth the effort. These types of mental compromises happen more subconsciously than intentionally. I’m really not against change, but something about the unknown factor freaks me out on a primal level. Continue reading “Preparing To Move”